8:03 AM, Bristol โ Coffee levels: critical, weather: aggressively British
The Clarks Havisham Oak loafers arrived with the vibe of an unfussy aunt who secretly owns a motorbike. โCasual leather shoes for women,โ yawned the box. As a devotee of โflip-flops unless frostbite threatensโ, I doubted their ability to handle nursery runs, supermarket aisles, and my mid-life crisis. Challenge accepted.
8:45 AM: School Drop-Off Tango
Fed children half a Weetabix each, stuffed lunchboxes (hummus leakage inevitable). Slid on the Havisham Oaks. The soft leather upper bent like a yoga instructor, zero break-in required. Toddler sprint? Mastered it. Survived a rogue scooter to the ankle. Shoes unscathed. My soul? Numb.
Verdict: Agility: parkour mum. Breakfast choices: legally questionable.
11:00 AM: Office Admin & Existential Dread
At my desk (legs inexplicably crumbs), I pretended to understand Excel. The Ortholiteยฎ footbed cushioned my soles like a Cadburyโs Flake wrapper cushions disappointment. Boss: โAre thoseโฆnew shoes?โ Me: โClarks. Theyโre for people whoโve given up on heels.โ Colleague Jess: โDo they come with wine?โ Nodded. Office morale: +10%.
1:30 PM: Lunchtime Guerrilla Grocery Dash
Snuck out for meal prep supplies (read: chocolate). The lightweight sole handled Sainsburyโs floors like a pro, while the grippy outsole laughed at spilled quinoa. Accidentally wore them into the wine aisle. Boots looked just chic enough to mute my existential hummus shame.
Verdict: Style: โI meal prepโ. Reality: Creme Egg loyalty cardholder.
4:20 PM: Raindrops & Rogue Puddles
Heavens unleashed. Commuters morphed into umbrellas; I channeled Gene Kelly. The leatherโs natural finish repelled drizzle like Nigella denies dieting. Woman in soaked trainers: โYouโre DRY?!โ Smugness level: Unicorn on a rainbow.
7:15 PM: Pub Debates & Dignity Relapse
Met friends, boots straddling โschool governorโ and โmay steal your chipsโ. Spilled garlic dip โ wiped clean with a crisp packet. Mate Karen: โClarks? Practically archived in the 2004 catalogue.โ Me: โTheseโve seen more action than your Tinder matches.โ Silence. Victory via loafer.
10:00 PM: Cobblestone Gauntlet
Staggered home, guided by Deliveroo cyclists. The contoured footbed absorbed cobbles like a sponge absorbs Pinot Grigio regrets. Toe box? Roomy. Moral compass? Left at the kebab shop.
Final Review: The Unfussy Overachiever
Pros:
- Survived scooter assaults, rain tantrums, and Karenโs sarcasm.
- Leather:ย Wipes clean quicker than a politicianโs browser history.
- Comfort: โCould jog the M25. Wouldnโt. Butย could.โ
Cons:
- Too versatile. Now my slippers feel judged.
- The rich oak colour clashed with myย otherย leggings. Scandal.
Rating: 4.8/5 (Docked 0.2 for enabling my crisp-based life choices).
Where to Channel Your Inner Practical Goddess
Ready to prioritise joy over blisters? The Clarks Havisham Oak loafers are loitering at 121 Shoes, flaunting a 365-day return policy (because adulting is 90% returns anyway).
Final Thought: These arenโt shoes โ theyโre a permission slip to laugh at bad weather, crumbs, and Tinder ghosts. Perfect for women who adult on a need-to-know basis.
